Hey! For Christmas you can buy my novel, Table of the Lord, for both yourself and others on your Christmans list. It would make a wonderful addition to your book collection. I guarantee that you will find it interesting or . . . you can indulge yourself in an ice fudge ripple with mocha chunks and peppermint. My novel is a touch complicated, but very accessible. Get it, read it, like it.

And please, restrict your buying choices to royalty generating brand new copies.

One of my favorite commercials is the one where this guy is a radio talk show host and he has a really desparate urge to use the facilities. At the same time some guy, "Dave," calls in, a droner, and he starts going on about his problems. In the meantime someone hands over Pepto bismol or something to the talk show host who scampers to use the facilities. The next scene then is the talk show host returning from his ordeal obviously feeling much lighter and less stressed. Smiling he dons the headset and sits down as Dave is finishing up the following sentence:

Dave:" . . . so do you think it was alright to invite my mom along to the honeymoon."

"Dave, absolutely!"